All night long on my bed I looked for the one my heart loves; I looked for him but did not find him. I will get up now and go about the city, through its streets and squares; I will search for the one my heart loves. So I looked for him but did not find him. The watchmen found me as they made their rounds in the city. "Have you seen the one my heart loves?" (Song of Songs 3: 1-3)

I expect most have experienced a night such as this, especially when we were young and love was new.

The absence of the other awakes and compels us. We feel torn in two by our separation. It is too painful and we run into the night seeking him or her.

It was - for me - always at night. In the quiet darkness I would go to the other, wondering and worried by the strength of my emotion.

There are those for whom this emotion defines love, even when no longer young. I question their maturity and intention.

But I also question a so-called love that is no longer seeking, suppresses emotion, and fails to ask, "Have you seen the one my heart loves?"